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How to become a Master of Seduction
Calling all shy, awkward guys: You can score by just being you -- just drop the 'hey baby'
Cheryl Chan, The Province
Published: Sunday, November 04, 2007Over the phone from Montreal airport, Zan Perrion points out that the nickname came from a reporter.
"I wouldn't call myself that," he says. "I'm just a guy interested in a dialogue."
In seduction terminology, the 43-year old Vancouver-based coach is a "rake" -- someone who loves and appreciates women.
He teaches men the secrets of attraction, but his real fans, he says, are the women themselves.
"Men talk about the notion that they're not sure how to react in the dating world, and what their role is supposed to be," he says.
"And women say to me everywhere, 'Where are the real men who don't apologize for being a real man?'"
Perrion says men should state their intentions clearly and approach women without what he calls "the beer shield."
"Women are craving men who don't dial themselves down and who are not afraid to be our true selves," he says.
After travelling the world giving seminars in cities such as Cape Town, Panama City, Frankfurt and San Francisco, he agrees that his hometown is a big challenge for singles of both sexes.
"In other cities . . . people really mingle," says Perrion. "Here, we go out in little groups, we sit in little groups, mingle in our group and then go home. There's no spirit of celebration."
Perhaps that's why business is booming.
On Nov. 30, Perrion will hold a three-day intensive workshop on the Way of Attraction at the Sutton Place Hotel.
Lee has a whole slew of courses scheduled for the month, and will be launching a new coaching company for women next week called Happy Sexy You.
For women to meet guys, he says, they need to "let go of the fear of rejection, make it easier on the poor guy and give him some signals."
But back to men. Here is what I learned from these two seduction masters on how best to approach potential girlfriends:
Say "Hello," not "Hey, baby." Be confident but respectful. Be direct but not presumptuous. Be sincere but not a wuss.
Be alpha-male masculine, but not caveman-like.
Be yourself, just with better communication skills.
chchan@png.canwest.com
RONALD LEE SUGGESTS THESE FIVE OPENING LINES
1. Ask for their opinion. "Can I ask you for a quick female perspective?"
2. If you find them attractive, say so. "You're really cute/beautiful."
3. "You have a very interesting energy. What''s your thing?"
4. "You have a beautiful smile."
5. Say something spontaneous and relevant to the situation, such as "I love your top," or "How's your coffee?"
