Sign up for our NewsletteAnd get a free talk on How To Kiss on the 1st Date.
|
|
|
|
What Happens to You When You Feel Approach Anxiety
Approach anxiety is the term used when a man (or woman) feels sweaty, nervous, and stressed when the critical moment comes to approach someone he doesn't know, to start an interaction with them.
Actually, this is really common with guys who are new to the dating /new to the club scene. It takes them a lot of time to warm up to actually talk to a girl because they always either:
1) question themselves and then talk themselves out of approaching.
2) let thoughts of rejection get so strong that it literally scares them from approaching.
It's that first approach that is the hardest and the reason is because of how your body deals with the sudden anxiety. We have something called the fight or flight reflex and when we are anxious, such as when deciding to first approach a woman, it turns itself on in reaction to the higher stress levels.
What this also does (among many things to our body) is that it will turn off our minds so that we can react by instinct. But this doesn't help the aspiring seducer as now his mind has gotten blank!
The only way to solve this is through forcing your body through enough approaches so that it will generate hormones to allow your body to compensate with the higher stress levels and your mind will be able to think again.
How many approaches? It depends on the individual in question, for some its 50, for others its several hundred. Key is to force yourself through this feeling as fast and as often as you can and have quality interactions with women (or people if you are afraid of approaching strangers of either sex).
After the first approach of the night, your body will begin to adapt to the stress level a bit and then will relax (as if you were on a rollercoaster) and thus it will be easier to approach more women...unless you wait too long before the next approach and thus do #1 or #2 again.
The best thing to do is to go out, have fun, don't put pressure on yourself and push yourself to talk to as many people as you can. Unfortunately this will make you into an approach machine to approach a lot of people initially (not my idea of high level game) but as you relax in the future and get used to it, you'll be able to selectively choose the women you want to talk to and make quality interactions happen out of that.
Just my one and a half cent (and my degree in kinesiology).
Go on to find out about our courses.
|